Game On
by SuperMegaFoxyAwesomeHot
Summary: virginbunnybums on Tumblr prompted "why is lube always right there in fanfics i want a fic where there's no lube and the characters are just like fck we need to go to walgreens put ur dick away"


**This is the smuttiest I've ever been, so feedback would be appreciated!**

* * *

Kurt thought he was about to go out of his goddamn mind. Blaine had been teasing him _all day_ , coming up behind him to press kisses to his neck, smoothing "wrinkles" out of Kurt's shirt and slacks in order to stroke over areas he knew were erogenous for him, and purposely jutting out his ass as he bent over to pick up something he'd "dropped," making Kurt afraid for the structural integrity of Blaine's tight chinos.

(Also, how the fuck did Blaine not have panty lines in those pants? Kurt felt woozy as he considered Blaine going commando, the blood in his body uncertain of whether it should rush to his head or his dick at the thought.)

Blaine entangling his body with Kurt's on the subway ride home "so he wouldn't fall over during turns" was the last straw.

"Bed. _Now_ ," Kurt said once they fumbled the front door open, both of them fighting for the lock at once. "God, you're driving me _insane_ , B."

"Can't believe it took you this long to crack," Blaine gasped, barely moving his lips from Kurt's neck as they walked towards their room in a heap of limbs. "Thought you'd tackle me before lunch today, how did you even-"

"I thought _you_ were going to stop teasing and start getting to work at some point," Kurt responded, just as breathless. "How was I supposed to know you wanted me to initiate? Oof!"

Blaine had pushed him onto the bed, making his knees hit against the end of the mattress. Kurt scrambled up towards the headboard, practically tearing off the buttons on his shirt as he did.

"Maybe we need some kind of code word," Blaine said, staring at Kurt from the end of the bed with lust in his darkened eyes. "So we know who's supposed to be the more... _dominant_ partner that day."

"I swear to God, if you suggest something dumb like 'code red,' I will get out of this bed and go watch _Real Housewives_ , blue balls be damned," Kurt said, nearly growling out the words. "Anyways, that's a problem for _later_. Why aren't you on top of me yet?"

"God, you're cranky when you're turned on," Blaine said, stripping off his own shirt before crawling in next to Kurt and planting a deep kiss on him. "Better?"

"Much," Kurt replied, pulling Blaine in for another kiss before moving his hands down to the waistline of Blaine's pants. "Would help if these were off, too, though."

"I suppose I could do th- _aat_ ," Blaine said, moaning mid-sentence when Kurt squeezed his ass before rubbing at the seam of his pants. He unbuttoned his pants and started pulling them down, a process Kurt joined in on when Blaine wasn't going _fast enough dammit._

"Knew you were going commando," Kurt said happily.

"Fair's fair," Blaine said, reaching for the button on Kurt's jeans. "Let's see what you've got."

Kurt helped Blaine wriggle him out of his jeans, smirking when he saw Blaine go glassy-eyed at the sight of his tiny red briefs.

"Jesus _Christ_ , Kurt," Blaine said, cupping his face for another kiss. "Underwear off, now now now."

"Now you're getting it," Kurt said, letting out a laugh that turned into a moan as Blaine started sucking kisses down his neck. He peeled off his briefs and chucked them across the room, glad to _finally_ be naked and pressed up against Blaine. "Where's the lube?"

"I got it," Blaine said, breaking away to reach for their nightstand drawer.

Kurt busied himself by kissing and nipping at Blaine's torso, thinking he might try to leave a mark or two when Blaine suddenly groaned in displeasure.

"What? Did I hurt you?" Kurt asked, instantly alert. "Did that muscle spasm come back?"

"No, it's just - we're out of lube," Blaine said, dragging a hand through his hair. He rolled off Kurt and laid down next to him, looking put out.

"Are you kidding me?" Kurt said, irate. "How are we out of lube? We have that delivery - oh, but there was that postal workers' strike this month." He draped his arm over his eyes in frustration. "Fuck."

"Yes, I'd like to," Blaine said, equally disgruntled. "But we have no lube!"

"I'm _aware_ , Blaine," Kurt snapped. He paused for a moment, then turned to his side to fix Blaine with a calculating stare. "What would it take to convince you to run to Walgreen's and get us lube real quick?"

"Kurt…." The flicker of interest in Blaine's eyes belied his wary words.

"I could go find our bondage kit while you're gone," Kurt continued impishly. "Start getting it set up. After all, I didn't catch on to your hints today. Maybe something should be done about that."

Blaine moaned, leaping up to retrieve his clothes from all over the room. "Now who's teasing whom?"

"Revenge is sweet, dear," Kurt said, smiling triumphantly as he watched his husband haphazardly reclothe himself. "I'll be waiting when you get back!"

"Just remember, you volunteered for this," Blaine said, a wicked glint in his eyes.

Kurt shivered as Blaine practically ran out the door, suddenly very grateful that the drugstore was only half a block away.


End file.
